Totally Legal

I figured it out. And it's totally legal! I'm two months into my experiment of contracting poison ivy multiple times during the summer (for multiple summers), thus prompting my doctor to prescribe steroids for me. I'm pretty sure that I'm already feeling more muscular, and I've had many young ladies looking my way as I go about my day-to-day activities. That could be because of my freakish rash, but more likely due to my new physique. I just wanted to pass on the advice to one of the most frequented blogs on the planet.

P.S. One other piece of advice to your readers: Don't use bleach on poison ivy. I tried that once to "speed up" the healing process, and ended up with very bad burns.

1. Thanks for the plug.
2. You'll never get a big enough dose to do the trick. Good luck, though.
3. I'll always remember what my Grammy used to tell me everytime we'd visit her in Nebraska: "Skin should never come in contact with bleach, acid, or Boron -- Anyone who thinks it should is pretty much a complete moron."

posted by Lawrence A. Fing @ 12:00 PM