All Giddy
I've found my soulmate...finally! Scott is so good-looking and charming; I get all giddy just thinking about him. And even though he's married, it turns out that his wife has terminal cancer. Plus, she's bipolar and refuses to take her medicine -- we all know what that means. Can you say "PMS times ten"? Plus, she has a rare condition that doesn't allow her to be intimate with him. My heart just goes out to Scott. He's such a good guy -- it's a crime that he's in such a destructive marriage. I'm so thankful that I'm able to be there for him. We get to see each other at work and at the occasional sports event (his sons play soccer and basketball), but he turns into a different person when he's with his wife. I think he's embarrassed of her. How can I bring him out of his shell?
His wife needs to accept the fact that she's dying and that there's someone else who can make him happy. The best way for her to get the inevitable through her thick skull is for you to be as affectionate as possible in public. You might try inviting them both into your home to start the transition process. Scott is a lucky man to have found you. I know you guys will be happy together for many, many months.
The Ruse
I don't know what to do about "Lisa". We're pretty hot and heavy into an affair, but she's becoming less and less discreet. This whole thing's going to blow up in my face. The only thing saving us is the fact that my wife is the most naive person in the world. I've told Ginger that when she's around my wife she has to ignore me, or be cool about it, but she can't seem to help herself. I'm just so good-looking and charming that she just has to throw herself at me. So then I have to act all aloof. Meanwhile, my wife just fumes and I have to hear about Ginger all the way home. I tell her that she's flirtatious with everyone at work also, and the company is losing money because of her. What do I do about her?
Well, it would be a mistake to break off the relationship at this stage, since it sounds like you're happy when you're (alone) together. And the important thing is your happiness, as well as keeping this from your wife. Do you have any kids you can use to distract your wife for you? Maybe pay them off to help with the ruse?
Extra Mile
I have been married to "Scott" for several years. He's a wonderful man. It's the second marriage for me, the third for Scott. We are in our 40s and attend a lot of school sporting events for his youngest sons. We live in a small town. Scott grew up here and knows everyone. My problem is the mother of one of the team members. We'll call her "Delilah". She is married but seems to have issues. She's obnoxiously flirtatious with Scott. Her husband has not accompanied her to many of the games, and her behavior is escalating. I'm not usually a jealous person, but this is getting annoying. I have, until this point, always been nice to her. I even complimented her on losing weight once, even though it didn't look like she had lost any. And why is it that she can't just let her "come get me" outfits do the work for her, instead of going the extra mile in case there are blind people who haven't noticed her? I'm just wondering how Scott can stand seeing her every day at work. She must be quite a bother, because he frequently has to stay at the office late to get all the work done that Chatty Cathy wouldn't let him do. So what can I do about this?
You may want to consider pulling your (his) sons out of the sporting events. You don't need the aggravation. Or, if Scott insists, he can go alone and suffer through Delilah's advances while you take a bath.
